Daily Archives: April 1, 2012

The Ultimate Sacrifice

Posted on by
5

Naturally, after the passing of Jane, my mind has been running non stop with questions, battling with what has happened, and constantly reminding myself that God’s plan never returns void (Romans 8:28). I was also reminded of the story in Daniel where Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego were tested but in the end they proclaimed that no matter what the outcome was they would never bow down to the gods and idols, they would only worship and give glory to the one true God (Daniel 3:16-18).

So, as I ponder these truths and work them in my mind over and over again I still feel the deepest pain imagineable with Jane not being here by my side. I dream about life with her, how wonderful it was, and how peaceful I felt. Life with Jane was simpler. I realized what was important and how many things didn’t even matter. I mean, Daniel and I took cold showers for a month in Stanford because the water never got hot. We asked them to fix it, but it never happened. I wore the same 3 pants and shirts over and over. Now I’m not saying we all haven’t been there. In fact I’m sure all mothers and fathers can vouch for the sacrifices they make for their children- ours weren’t any greater…my point that I’m coming to is that we all make sacrifices and I just finally realized that my life was so much better when I started focusing on the Lord; that a life for Christ is so much more fulfilling. Paul writes in Romans 12: I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service.2 And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.

With the Passover approaching I cant help but think about God sacrificing His own Son and me having to give up Jane to the Lord. In no way am I comparing the sacrifices because giving up Jane doesnt even come close….God willingly sacrificed His son and, quite frankly, I would never have willingly gave up Jane. What I do know, though, is that God willingly gave up His son for me, to gift me with salvation and because of this I cant help but fall on the Lord and know that He loves me so much and will not forsake me. So now, Lord, I ask that if you would only take away a part of this pain that pierces my heart I would be grateful.


Psalm 40

Posted on by
3

I read this Psalm to Jane very often….

I waited patiently for the Lord;
And He inclined to me,
And heard my cry.
2 He also brought me up out of a horrible pit,
Out of the miry clay,
And set my feet upon a rock,
And established my steps.
3 He has put a new song in my mouth—
Praise to our God;
Many will see it and fear,
And will trust in the Lord.

4 Blessed is that man who makes the Lord his trust,
And does not respect the proud, nor such as turn aside to lies.
5 Many, O Lord my God, are Your wonderful works
Which You have done;
And Your thoughts toward us
Cannot be recounted to You in order;
If I would declare and speak of them,
They are more than can be numbered.

6 Sacrifice and offering You did not desire;
My ears You have opened.
Burnt offering and sin offering You did not require.
7 Then I said, “Behold, I come;
In the scroll of the book it is written of me.
8 I delight to do Your will, O my God,
And Your law is within my heart.”

9 I have proclaimed the good news of righteousness
In the great assembly;
Indeed, I do not restrain my lips,
O Lord, You Yourself know.
10 I have not hidden Your righteousness within my heart;
I have declared Your faithfulness and Your salvation;
I have not concealed Your lovingkindness and Your truth
From the great assembly.

11 Do not withhold Your tender mercies from me, O Lord;
Let Your lovingkindness and Your truth continually preserve me.
12 For innumerable evils have surrounded me;
My iniquities have overtaken me, so that I am not able to look up;
They are more than the hairs of my head;
Therefore my heart fails me.

13 Be pleased, O Lord, to deliver me;
O Lord, make haste to help me!
14 Let them be ashamed and brought to mutual confusion
Who seek to destroy my life;
Let them be driven backward and brought to dishonor
Who wish me evil.
15 Let them be confounded because of their shame,
Who say to me, “Aha, aha!”

16 Let all those who seek You rejoice and be glad in You;
Let such as love Your salvation say continually,
“The Lord be magnified!”
17 But I am poor and needy;
Yet the Lord thinks upon me.
You are my help and my deliverer;
Do not delay, O my God.