Daniel and I enjoy gardening. It’s one of those things we do together and get super excited about. Watching a plant grow and blossom from a seed is truly a gift from God; I see it as a way that God shares his beauty with us. Needless to say, when we found out about Jane and that she would be born in January we decided to plant pink cyclamen for her because that was her favorite color, of course 🙂 (every season we plant new annual color so that was our choice for welcoming Jane home) I wish I could post a picture of them, but sadly I only got to see them in person once. The rest of the time I was in the hospital.

Nowadays, our garden..our home..is a safe, special place to remember her. I used to tell my friends that Jane and I were going to pick lavender together from our garden. They always made fun of me saying that Jane probably wouldn’t even like to garden. LOL Even so this is the place I come to, to dream about her and fantasize how life could have been…twirling in our dresses in the garden.

God’s Little Lamb

I found this picture online and had to laugh. I always imagined Jane in her cute little outfits running around on the farm at Deda and Babunya Kosareff’s house. She would be having so much fun and getting so dirty and yes, probably dragging around the animals.

…a few years back I went to a Bible study and the teacher always referred to the children as little lambs. It was so precious to me and stuck with me always. Jane was God’s little lamb that He let us raise and be with for 7 weeks. A few months after Jane passed away we received a heart-warming, tear jerking letter of encouragement where the writer referenced how we are children of God, lambs of God….and of course Christ being the Ultimate Sacrifice. She reminded us that God chose us to be the shepherd of our little lamb, Jane. With great joy I lift my hands to God for the gift to be Jane’s parents and to partake of His will.

October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness month. Every year an organization called www.ocwalktoremember.org hosts a walk where people go out and walk the steps their babies never got to take. All the proceeds go to supporting families in their time of grief. This year it was on October 6th in Irvine. We walked to remember Jane and had great support from our friends and family!

***All the way from Australia, my family remembered Jane!