A Gut Feeling

The biopsy has been cancelled. I just had a strong feeling that we shouldnt do the biopsy. The benefit did not seem to outweigh the risk and I couldnt seem to find a peace in this all. I prayed all day, all night and all this morning for God to miraculously intervene. I couldnt go through with the procedure unless everyone was on board and fully committed…and that just wasnt the case. The team of surgeons met this morning and all agreed that the procedure was much too risky. After all teams met- cardiac team, surgeons, and GI- not one of them completely felt that this was the best thing to do.

WHAT A RELIEF! (and thanking God for His intervention)

Roller Coaster Ride

Now that the biopsy today has been cancelled, I can’t describe just how relieved I feel. Yesterday I felt like a zombie walking around in anticipation of today’s procedure, and I wasn’t able to sleep last night, because the biopsy was such of an extreme risk. It was such a painful day that we looked for God everywhere, and saw, felt, heard nothing. And cried the entire time on our valentine’s date. We never were much for Valentine’s Day, but we just needed a break and get away for a couple hours.

Yesterday, the doctors & nurses were all extremely nervous for Jane, but all felt strongly that the biopsy was necessary. And for as “gung-ho” as they were about doing it last night, they were that much AGAINST doing it today. They decided it probably won’t complicate things to wait on the biopsy, so they said let’s just wait and see. Totally frustrating, but at least it’s not a life-threatening operation.

So Elisabeth & I are trying to gather our emotions after being beaten to a pulp, especially over the last couple days. This roller coaster of emotions is really taking its toll. Yesterday was the darkest day of my life, and today was a day of indescribable relief. Seems like this has happened at least twice already in a bit smaller magnitude. God certainly does have something special in His wonderful plans.

The focus is still on the liver, so the overall plan is: 1) wait and see if liver function can improve, 2) send liver genetic tests to Cincinnati, 3) hopefully wait a month or more for biopsy, 4) increase breast milk consumption, 5) work on strengthening her lungs to take out breathing tube–then go from there. Realistically, we’re getting comfortable up here.

Final news for the day: There is a line in Jane’s chest going directly in to her heart. Doctors aren’t letting us hold her, because if this line falls out, it means bad news. She doesn’t really need that line any more, so the doctors are going to do a small procedure around 7am Thursday to take the line out. Long story–short. I might get to hold her by her 1 month birthday. Woohoo!